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So for the past few weeks, I've got into a bunch of new video games which you might have heard about if you're a PC user and have way too much time on your hands.
First off, Skullgirls. Skullgirls is a 2D fighting game that is much like Street Fighter, but much more cartoony and goofy. You get to fight as multiple women fighting for an ancient artifact called "The Skull Heart" which will grant one woman's wish, but she gets turned into a terrible monster if she is impure of heart. Seems legit.
The only reason I found out about Skullgirls is because of the many workshop items that were never put into the game. A shame, it is, because there is a lot of kick-ass stuff that the community makes. Seriously. Only one problem. I don't know if the characters have turned into Skullgirls yet or if they're just fine, because I don't think hair turns into a pair of extra jaws! Unless you're Mawile, of course.
Second, the Steam Workshop. You know before writing this blog, I never really thought about talking about the Workshop, but for now it'll have to do as a filler so that this is the longest blog possible on Newgrounds, Right. Next paragraph!
I've seen some really cool and kick-ass stuff on the Steam Workshop, especially the new weapons. If you've been on the Steam Workshop for a while now, you'll notice that the items that come out in the new updates are community-made items that had different names. For example, the Rescue Ranger was called "a Modified Shotgun." Believe me or not, just go check out the "Accepted for Game" tab and go all the way back to the last page and scroll forward. You'd be surprised at what their original names were. And I've seen a lot of cool other stuff on the Workshop too, if Valve would just let them go into the game. Then again, it'd take up a lot of space on your computer...
I'd like to tell people that the new cinematic for World of Warcraft: Warlords of Draenor looks frickin' amazing. But I probably don't-because you might have ALREADY WATCHED IT!!! I've never been this hyped for WoW, especially thanks to the monthly fee which I still have no idea of how much it costs, but once I get enough cash to play for an hour, I'll consider. Yet this seems like one of the best CG trailers Blizzard has even made. It's so good, it makes the game look less dorky and more epic. Now all we have to do is wait for Leeroy to get his guild beaten to a pulp by those damn Whelps.
Next up, Pokemon! Yes, call me childish and immature for loving Pokemon, but let me give you two good reasons why you should can it, twinkle toes! First off, I have had my childhood resurrected thanks to Pokemon, and two, I never played Ruby or Sapphire YES I AM A CHEAPSKATE, but other than that, I just want the game to see the new Mega Evolutions and the Hoenn region. More specifically, of course, to get the Mega Blaziken that I missed out on. And get my hands on new Megas! Of course.
Next, there's a brand new Saints Row game coming out! Yay! Hot dogs for everyone! BUT WAIT! This time it takes place in Hell, you know that place with demons and succubuses and ghouls that seems a bit too overused when Doom started the trend. It's now called Gat Out of Hell. I found that title more funny than the story line itself! Ha! I get it. Punchlines. Overall, it's just like SR4, but I never played the game before, so I might as well give it a go. Maybe.
Next, CoD Advanced Warfare! By the way, does it seem easier to talk words than it is to write them? Never mind. CoD is a game where you run around killing a bunch of dudes and Advanced Warfare is completely indifferent from that! Might as well go fishing WHOA HEY PUNCHLINE LOLOLOLOL ROFLCOPTER #BESTCOMEDIANEVAR360QUICKNOSCOPE
I'd like to be as detailed as I can about the next things I'm going to tell you readers that will surely bore you. First, Link and other guys will become DLC soon for Mario Kart 8. As if the Luigi death stare wasn't enough. Now we have an Animal Crossing death stare.
And next, the dreaded news. Amazon has bought Twitch. I found this out thanks to the handsome fellows at Penny Arcade. The comic strip: http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2014/08/27/like-you-do
Frankly, I never used Twitch, WHY WOULD I CARE, but being a gamer like the guys over at PA, I have to agree with them. I'm a little confused as to why the largest online shopping center bought the largest streaming website ever-maybe they play LoL, as well. I don't know. Does it look like I livestream? Probably not, but still.
If Amazon is going to take over the gaming industry now and not over the other industries, we might as well wait for another rip-off console called "The Furnace." Get it? Kindle Fire? Fire Phone? No? Crap.
Gaming is a business of its own. If you're trying to get the gaming industry involved with the online business world, don't. Gaming and shopping online don't go together. If we actually made an online shopping game, there'd be half an entire server trying to grab the last golden Twinkie bar. And noobs having no idea what the hell they're supposed to do.
But the big question here is what? What is going to happen to Twitch now? What could become of Amazon after they have angered so many gamers? And what is the time? Jesus, been writing for nearly an hour! Well, I hope this gives all of you gamers a good understanding of what I feel inside.
Not constipation, though.